Monday, December 22, 2008

Aftermath

Janet is doing well in the aftermath of having lost her mom. They were very close, best friends by any measure. I don't think two days would pass that Janet didn't visit or call her mom. I think as the days go on, that desire to pick up the phone is going to haunt her, leave her feeling empty -- I know it would me. But for now, in the first few weeks after her passing, I'm relieved at how well she is doing. She's strong; not so strong as to make you worry about her. I don't see any sign of denial or that she's simply repressing her feelings; rather, I think she simply has a life that is rich enough to keep her busy and not allow her to fall into a tortured sorrow.

For me, I miss Margaret. My eyes fill with tears almost every time I think about her and the fact that we won't see her again this side of the veil. I feel that all the more so when I think that Janet no longer has her mom and that Benjamin will never know a person who loved him so terribly much, someone who did so much for him in such a short time. Ben, if these words persist until a time when you can read them and comprehend them, please know that there was someone who loved you so very, very much who you haven't yet met. Praise God that one day when this is all over, you will.

Quite literally, on her death bed, Margaret spoke with our Pastor on two occasions. On that second occasion, she made a profession of faith and claimed Jesus Christ as her savior. Had this not happened, I'm not sure any of us could endure her loss with the strength and patience that we have. It's the hope that we will see her again one day, and this time in paradise, with no fear of ever being separated again, that helps us (certainly helps me) carry on.